This week we take a closer look at positive relationships, what they are and why they matter. This is the third part of a five-part series all around the PERMA model which, looks at the key levers for happiness. When we have positive relationships in our lives we feel happier and have a greater sense of well-being! So, how do we make this happen?
How do we know if they are positive or not?
Of course, no relationship is positive all of the time. We will face constant ups and downs and may often feel that our relationships do too. The key is to ensure you have a balance of positive vs. negative relationships. One way to think about this is to conduct a relationship MOT. This allows you to and think about each of your key relationships and assess whether they are positive ie. generally, make you feel good or negative ie. generally, make you feel less good. Thinking of your relationships in this way is the first step in assessing your current state.
What if the relationships aren’t good?
We are definitely not advocating that you ditch any relationship that doesn’t feel good! Relationships are like a garden, you have to feed them, water them and occasionally weed them. So, why not take a look at the relationships that aren’t feeling good at the moment and think about why. It may be that when you look at things differently you see a different side to that person and realize that you could be doing something different too.
Focus on the good stuff
Another good trick for building positive relationships is to think about the things that make them good. So, head back to your relationship MOT and look at those relationships that are working well for you. Think about the factors that are common to those relationships, is it about time spent together, the way you communicate or something else? Try and identify the things that are common in these relationships and then put more of these things into your relationships.